Gifts of the Heart
by true.blue.and.gold
Summary: Begins when Mac brings Mattie to the Wall on Christmas Eve. Things go a little differently from there.
1. Family Christmas

Disclaimer: No infringement of rights is intended. This story is for entertainment purposes only, not for profit.

Spoilers: Anything up to and including season 9. Some dialog is taken directly from the episode "Merry Little Christmas"

Gifts of the Heart

Chapter 1: Family Christmas

The tall man dressed in Navy dress blues ran his fingers across the name etched in black marble. Harmon Rabb Sr. A light snow began to fall as Commander Harmon Rabb Jr. turned from the Vietnam Memorial Wall, feeling more despair than he usually did on his annual Christmas Eve visit. Now not only was December 24th the anniversary of his father's death, but it was the day he lost his daughter. He had already let himself think of Mattie Grace that way and now his heart was breaking.

"Harm," a familiar voice said. He turned to see Mattie. "Hi."

"What are you doin' here?" he asked, not believing his eyes.

"You're my guardian!" she answered and turned to look behind her to see his friend and partner Lieutenant Colonel Sarah Mackenzie smiling at him and Mattie. "Mac talked to my dad. He agreed to step aside. So won't have to go to the foster family."

Harm stared at Mac a moment, stunned that she had again stepped in on his behalf, and then asked, "How did you do that?"

"I convinced him that now that he's stopped drinking he'll have to start dealing with life. And he's not fit to take care of Mattie until he can take care of himself." Harm continued to stare at Mac in disbelief as she explained the situation. "Mr. Johnson agreed to a full course of treatment. And if he can pull his life together and if Mattie wants then they'll give it a shot."

"Until then I'm yours!" Mattie grinned at Harm.

Harm smiled at Mac as Mattie wrapped her arms around him. He couldn't believe she had done this for him. Not after everything that had happened between them. He knew in that moment that Sarah Mackenzie was not only the best and most loyal friend he had ever had, but also his heart and his soul mate.

Mac returned his smile and he could see his emotions mirrored in her eyes. Mattie broke the spell and said, "You can hug me you know, I won't break." So Harm returned her embrace.

Mac took the opportunity to leave them alone, she turned to leave, "Goodnight," she said.

"Where are you going?" Harm asked, trying to keep the disappointment out of his voice and failing. He desperately wanted her to stay so he could thank her. So they could celebrate together, the three of them.

"I have a...a date with Webb," she answered hesitantly. Mac didn't really want to leave, but she felt like she was intruding. She had helped get Mattie safely into Harm's care. She felt it was the least she could do, as a friend, to make sure he was happy. But it wasn't her place to stay, even if she wanted to with all her heart. "Merry Christmas."

Webb. Harm thought he'd be angry when he heard who Mac was seeing that night. But he was just heartbroken. He couldn't stand to see her run into the arms of another man because he had hurt her again. He didn't try to cover the sadness on his face. Mattie saw it and interrupted. Pulling herself out of Harm's arms she ran to stop Mac from leaving.

"Mac! Wait!" She reached out to touch Mac's shoulder. Mattie shocked Mac by hugging her tightly. "Thank you so much for, for everything! Please come and celebrate with us!"

Mac closed her eyes against the tears that surprised her. She hugged Mattie back and looked up at Harm again. His expression was hopeful, almost pleading. He looked so sweet in that moment she felt her heart melt. How could she say no to them, to him?

"Let me make a phone call," she said to Mattie. Then she stepped away to call Clayton Webb. She had seen the CIA agent a few times since they had all come back from Paraguay. She was drawn to him initially through their shared experience in terror. Now she felt as if he was smothering her, always pushing her for more than she was willing to give him. She planned to tell him she didn't want to see him anymore after the holidays. She didn't want to hurt him that much and truthfully she hadn't wanted to spend New Year's Eve alone.

"Clay, hi," she said when he answered on the second ring. "About tonight, something's come up. I can't make dinner."

"_Sarah, I have something very special planned for tonight. Please don't back out on me. I promise you won't be disappointed,"_ said Webb in the tone he used when he was trying to coax more than a goodnight kiss from her. It made her skin crawl. She glanced over at Harm and Mattie. They had turned their attention back to the Wall. Harm appeared to be introducing Mattie to his father.

"I'm sorry Clay, I can't," she answered. "Not tonight. I'm so sorry. I have to get going. We'll talk later."

"_But Sar…"_ Mac hung up her phone.

Feeling like a coward for hanging up on Webb she shook her head and turned again to Harm and Mattie. This time Harm met her gaze. He had one arm wrapped around Mattie and he extended the other one to Mac. She closed the distance and took his hand. Together the three of them stood in silence for another moment in front of Harm's father's name. Mac reached out and touched it reverently, tracing the letters with her gloved hand. When she felt Harm squeeze her other hand she looked up at him. He was smiling at her and she felt her heart skip.

"So where do my two favorite women want to go celebrate?" Harm asked them.

"Can we just go home and maybe watch a movie or something?" asked Mattie.

"I don't have a TV at my place," Harm said, suddenly wishing he had thought to buy one.

"How about movie and a late dinner at my place," Mac offered.

"Thanks Mac," Harm whispered in her ear, making her shiver. "For everything."

####

Mattie and Harm went back to his place to change. Before they left harm grabbed a small but elegantly wrapped gift from the table by his bedside and slipped it in his pocket. Meanwhile, Mac picked up some Chinese take-out and went home to get ready for her guests. She built a fire, turned on the Christmas tree lights and lit the candles lining the mantle. Then she arranged the gifts under the tree so that the ones for Harm and Mattie were on top of the pile. She was very happy now that she had decided to buy the girl some gifts. Maybe she could convince Harm to let her open at least one of them tonight. She smiled. This was going to be the best Christmas ever!

After Mac was satisfied that everything was ready she went to change out of her uniform and into a soft sweater and her favorite pair of jeans. The ones that she knew fit her curves like a glove. Just as she returned from the bedroom there was a knock at the door.

"Coming!" she said enthusiastically and tried unsuccessfully to keep herself from bounding to the door. She flung it open and her smile as well as the color drained from her face.

"Expecting someone else, Sarah?" asked Webb standing in her doorway with a bottle of champagne.

"Clay what are you doing here? I said I couldn't get together tonight. I'm sorry but something came up," Mac stood in the doorway trying to keep him from looking into the apartment. He pushed his way in, as Mac could smell the alcohol emanating from him. Her stomach turned.

Clay looked around and took in the cozy scene of her living room.

"Well isn't this nice," he sneered "Who are you waiting for?"

"Harm and…"

"RABB!" Webb shouted and grabbed Mac by the upper left arm.

"Ow! Clay let me explain!" she tried to shrug his hand off her arm but he only tightened his grip. When he did that her Marine instincts kicked in she reached up with her right hand and wrenched his hand off her arm, locking his wrist in a painful position. Then she twisted his arm behind his back and jerked him up. At that moment Harm burst into the door with Mattie behind him.

"MAC! Are you ok?" Harm cried in alarm. Then he grabbed Webb by the lapels and lifted him off his feet.

"I'm fine, Harm," Mac answered calmly. "I'm a Marine remember. You can let him go now. He's not going to hurt anyone, are you Clay?"

"No," Webb squeaked. Harm dropped him to the ground and Webb almost crumpled into a heap on the floor. "I-I'm sorry Sarah, I didn't mean to get physical. I should have let you explain," Webb apologized as he glanced in Mattie's direction. At least he had the decency to look ashamed of himself, thought Mac.

"Clay, go home and sleep it off. We'll talk after Christmas," said Mac as she steered him toward the door. "But considered us over." Webb grumbled but he let himself be removed from the apartment with his bottle of expensive champagne.

Mac shut and bolted the door behind him. Then she leaned back against it and let out a shaky breath. She knew Mattie and Harm were both staring at her but she couldn't look up at them. Then suddenly she felt a pair of arms around her and she realized Mattie was hugging her. Then Harm's arms were encompassing them both. He placed a light kiss on one curly head, then one silky brunette one, squeezed them both a little tighter and led them to the couch.

"I'll go get dinner, you and Mac pick out a movie," Harm said to Mattie, and then he disappeared into the kitchen.

####

Harm went into the kitchen as much to get his anger under control as to prepare the meal. How dare Webb put his hands on Mac! Harm knew very well Mac could handle herself. That was obvious from the position that Webb found himself in. But it was still no excuse. Taking a few moments he plated the Chinese food and poured the sparkling grape juice he'd brought in to three champagne flutes and put them all on a tray. With one more deep breath he went back to join Mattie and Mac in the living room.

Harm stopped for a moment to admire them, sitting heads close together looking at a photo album on Mac's lap. They both looked so happy and content. Their eyes dancing like the fire light as they shared a laugh over the picture they were looking at. His heart felt like it was going to burst. A few hours ago he was in the depths of despair. Now he felt as if he had everything he needed to take on the world.

"Hey are you two beautiful ladies hungry?" Harm asked.

"YES!" Mac and Mattie answered in unison and they dissolved into more laughter. Mac closed the photo album and placed it on the coffee table.

"Mattie, what movie did you pick?" asked Harm, setting the tray on the coffee table and passing a plate to each of the girls.

"_It's a Wonderful Life. _Mac says it's a classic. I've never seen it before," Mattie answered.

"Well, we'll change that. I'll pop it in the player," Harm did and then settled down on the arm chair next to Mac's end of the couch. He picked up a glass of the sparkling grape juice and cleared his throat.

"Before the movie starts I want to make a toast," he paused while Mac and Mattie picked up their glasses. "Mac, I don't know how to thank you. You came through for me, again, when I needed you. Not once, but twice helping me take care of Mattie. You have no idea how much that means to me. And to you Mattie, here's to happier times for both of us. We're," Harm made a gesture that included not only Mattie, but Mac as well, "a family now."

Harm stopped before the emotions he was feeling overwhelmed him. The clinked there glasses together and Mac finished the toast by saying, "To the best Christmas ever!"

"To the best Christmas ever!" they all chorused and took a sip of the sweet, fizzy drink. Then they all settled in to watch the movie in comfortable silence.

As Mac sat trying to pay attention to the movie her mind wandered to the Harm and the differences between him and Clayton Webb. Harm was honest, steadfast and a gentleman. Clay could be a gentleman, when it suited him, but honesty didn't come naturally to him. More often than not when she called to talk to him, Clay wasn't there for her. Harm always was, or he tried his hardest to be.

Harm had never laid a hand on her in anger. Tonight, Clay had. Mac knew she could never allow that to happen again. She spent too many years watching her father smack her mother around until he broke her. Mac promised herself on that she would never live the way her mother had for all those years.

Then there was Clay's drinking. Mac had worked hard to get her alcoholism under control. Clay had been drinking more and more since Paraguay. She understood why, but she couldn't be around it. Tonight he had shown up drunk with a bottle of champagne. He had tried more than once to get Mac to share a glass of wine with dinner, even though she told him she didn't drink. Harm rarely drank around her and even then it was only a beer or two. Those few occasions were always at parties or after-work outings to McMurphy's with friends. He never drank when they were alone together.

It was those small things that he did for her that made her love him. She smiled at that thought. Love, head over heels, ridiculously in love with him. She was also falling for the teenager cuddled next to her on the couch. Harm and Mattie were a package deal now. Mac snuggled closer to Mattie and turned her attention back to the movie.

####

When the movie ended Harm looked over at the couch to see that both Mattie and Mac had fallen asleep, cuddled together under the same blanket. How did Harmon Rabb Jr. get so lucky? Not able to resist he reached over and ran a finger softly down Mac's smooth cheek. She stirred and looked up at him.

"Mattie's fast asleep," Harm whispered. "I should get her home."

"Why don't you try to settle her in the guest room?" said Mac. "That way we won't have to wake her."

Harm gently lifted the sleeping girl into his arms and followed Mac to the guest room. Together they tucked her in and kissed her forehead, both struck by how natural it was for them to be doing it. Then they slipped back out in to the living room.

"Do you, um, want to watch another movie or something?" Harm asked, suddenly a bit nervous.

"Why don't we have a cup of hot cocoa and open some presents?" Mac suggested.

"Presents? On Christmas Eve?" Harm teased.

"It's after midnight. Please, there's something I want to give you in private," said Mac. "We can wait 'til tomorrow to open the rest. I have a bunch of stuff for Mattie too."

"Wait, you bought gifts for Mattie! When? Why?" asked Harm, his admiration for Mac growing again. Every time he thought he couldn't love her more she proved him wrong.

"I couldn't help myself. She's been through so much. Even if the court case didn't go your way I wanted her to know that there are people that care for her," Mac explained. "She knows she has you. I wanted her to know I'm here for her too. That I have an idea what she's going through."

"Mac, you are amazing," Harm whispered and then unable to contain it any longer he through his arms around her and hugged her tight. "Thank you so much."

"Harm, you've thanked me enough," she laughed against his chest. "And as much as I'm enjoying this, you're squishing me Squid."

Reluctantly Harm let Mac go and she slipped in to the kitchen to prepare the cocoa and a plate of Harriet's Christmas cookies. Then she grabbed Harm's gift from under the tree and joined him on the couch.

While Mac was in the kitchen Harm retrieved her gift from his coat pocket. He stared at the small box in his hand debating whether or not to take this step tonight. It was a big one and would take a huge leap of faith on both their parts. Deciding he was ready to take the chance, he settled on the couch just as Mac returned from the kitchen.

"Here," she said thrusting his gift at him. "This is for you." _Great, Marine, real smooth_, she thought to herself.

"I wasn't sure…I wanted to get you …I-I-I…" Mac stammered, not sure why she was so nervous about this. "Never mind. Just open it.

Harm grinned like a little kid on, well, on Christmas and tore the ribbon from the flat box, and then made quick work of the paper. Inside was a framed charcoal rubbing of his father's name from the Vietnam Memorial. He felt his throat constrict. He swallowed against the rising emotion. It was matted in Navy blue and along the bottom was a replica of his father's ribbons along with his name and rank embossed in gold. At the top also embossed into the matting was a pair of gold wings. The frame plain but made from a deep mahogany.

"Wow Mac," Harm couldn't put into words how much he loved the deeply personal gift.

"I know you go to the Wall just about every Christmas Eve," Mac explained. "But you might not always be billeted in D.C. This way you can take a piece of it with you."

Not trusting him self to talk without crying Harm pulled Mac into his arms for a fierce hug. They stayed like that until Harm regained his composure. After about 2 minutes and 14 seconds, by Mac's estimate he finally pulled away a bit and looked into her eyes.

"It's perfect Mac. Thank you," Harm said simply. "I just hope my gift can measure up."

"Oh Harm, it doesn't have to 'measure up.' Now give it to me Flyboy!" Mac exclaimed.

"Yellow light, Colonel," Harm said with a waggle of his eye brows.

"The gift Flyboy," Mac laughed punching his arm lightly. "Get your mind out of the gutter."

She held out her hand expectantly. Harm lightly placed the small box in her palm. Then he saw Mac tense. She eyed the box suspiciously, not sure if she hoped it was what it looked like or if she didn't.

"Just open it," Harm urged.

Slowly Mac untied the ribbon and carefully removed the paper to reveal a green-velvet ring box. She slowly opened it to reveal a silver ring. It was two hands holding a heart between them. On top of the heart rested a crown. She remembered her Grandma O'Hara had one like it but it was plain silver. The heart in this one was a deep green.

"It's a claddagh," she whispered. "My grandfather gave one like it to my grandmother. It's lovely."

"So you know what it symbolizes?" asked Harm. Mac nodded yes, but Harm continued any way. "Love, friendship and loyalty. I thought that encompassed us. I chose the green onyx for the heart because you're my mean-green-marine."

"Did you know there are other meanings to this ring, depending how you wear it?" Mac asked Harm, as she remembered something her grandmother told her. Harm shook his head no, so Mac continued. "If you wear it with the point of the heart facing out it means you're looking for love, if you turn the heart in it means your heart belongs to someone."

"Does your heart belong to someone Sarah?" Harm asked in a hushed voice.

"Yes," was all she said before slipping the ring on her the third finger of her right hand, heart facing in. Then she reached up and placed her hand on his cheek and leaned in to kiss him.

After the initial shock Harm realized this was not a friendly, thanks-for-the-Christmas-present kiss. Sarah Mackenzie was offering him her heart.

####

Thank you for reading my first fic.


	2. From Here to Eternity

Disclaimer: See Chapter 1.

Chapter 2: From Here to Eternity

Three days after Christmas Harm and Mac were back at work bright and early on Monday morning. They had spent the entire weekend together, with Mattie, at Mac's apartment. They celebrated Christmas with presents and food and plenty of laughter. At night after Mattie had gone to bed they had found time to talk through many of their issues. Although, as Harm sat at his desk during a recess and recalled, they didn't talk the whole time.

_ "Mattie went to bed awfully early again," Mac observed on Saturday night. "It's barely 2100."_

_ "I think she's trying to give us some alone time," replied Harm. "Besides, since you hooked up that old lap top for her she's been dying to get online."_

_ "Alone time, huh?" said Mac as she took Harm's hand and led him to the couch. "I can deal with that."_

_ Harm grinned and pulled Mac down on top of him on the couch. Before long they were engaged in a hot and heavy make out session that would make the most hormonal teenager proud…_

A knock on the door frame brought him out of his pleasant memories. "Court is back in session, Sir," said Lt. Bud Roberts.

"Thanks Bud," Harm said with a slightly bashful grin. "I lost track of time." He shook his himself, _I better get my head in the game,_ he thought.

####

Meanwhile, in her office, Mac too was lost in memories of their first Christmas together when there was a knock on her door.

"Clay!" Mac started. "What are you doing here?"

"You said we would talk," Webb said quietly. "Do you have time for lunch?"

"I was planning on eating at my desk but I can spare a few minutes to talk," said Mac. "Let's go outside."

A half hour later Mac and Webb had cleared the air and stood to say goodbye. "Take care of your self Clay," said Mac. "I'll never forget what you did for me in Paraguay."

"Goodbye Sarah," he whispered taking her in his arms for one last hug. Then the spook climbed in to his BMW and drove off.

Mac watched as he drove away then turned to go back inside and saw Harm watching her from the front steps. "Everything ok, Marine," he asked as she approached.

"Yeah, I guess," answered Mac. "Clay came to say goodbye. He's taking a leave of absence from the Company. He said he thinks it might time to come in from the cold. He's going to stay at his mother's ranch in California and think about his future.

"He apologized for his behavior. He's going to look for a 12 step program out west. He knows he needs help," Mac looked in to Harm's eyes. "I hope he'll be ok. He kept me safe until you got there, you know."

"I know," Harm whispered. He knew he had a lot to be grateful to Clayton Webb for. Harm said a silent prayer that his old friend would put his life back together.

"Let's get back to work, Sailor. I want to get home at a decent time tonight." They walked back in to the building together both hoping the rest of the day would go quickly.

####

As Harm and Mac exited the elevator and entered the bullpen they heard Petty Officer Tiner call the room to attention "Admiral on Deck!"

"At ease people," said Admiral A.J. Chegwidden. "I have an announcement to make. My self and the four senior attorneys have been invited to the White House New Year's ball. Colonel Mackenzie, Commanders Rabb and Turner, Lieutenant Roberts you are ordered to attend. Gentlemen, full mess dress. Colonel you may wear a gown. You may each bring a guest. That's all, as you were."

"Well I guess that means we have plans for New Years," Harm said to Mac as they walked in her office. "Mattie was already planning a girl's night in with Coates."

"I think I'll call Harriet and see if she wants to go dress shopping with me," Mac replied. "I saw a dress in a shop near my place that I think will be perfect."

"Any excuse to go shopping," Harm winked at her. "Mac, do you think we should tell the Admiral that I'll be escorting you to the ball?"

Mac sighed and smiled at him. "I want to tell the world you're escorting me to the ball Prince Charming. Let's see if he's available."

####

On New Year's Eve Mac and Harriet were getting dressed together in Bud and Harriet's bedroom while Bud was relegated to the guest room. Harm dressed at his apartment and rode over in the rented limo to pick up Mac and the Roberts. He arrived just as Bud and Harriet were coming downstairs arm in arm.

"You look beautiful, Harriet," said Harm as he kissed her on the cheek admiring her long black gown.

"Thank you," Harriet beamed at him. "But wait 'til you see Mac. She is stunning!"

Right on cue Mac appeared at the top of the stairs. Stunning didn't begin to describe her in Harm's opinion. She was the most beautiful vision he had ever seen. Her gown was a deep red and she looked like she was floating down the stairs in the full skirt flowing from a form-fitting corseted bodice embroidered with silver roses.

As she reached the bottom Harm reached for her hand and brushed a kiss across her knuckles. "You're carriage awaits, milady." He draped her winter wrap over her bare shoulders and offered her his arm. The two happy couples left for a magical night at the White House.

####

The party was in the East Ballroom at the White House, but Harm had arranged a surprise for his marine on the west side of the building. They danced with each other and a few other partners, Harm with Harriet, Mac with Bud. Harm danced with an old academy friend, Mac danced with Admiral Chegwidden. Then at about 10 minutes to midnight Harm sought out Mac and pulled her aside.

"Follow me," he whispered in her ear. He led her to the cloak room and retrieved her cloak.

"Are we going home already?" Mac asked. "It's not New Years yet."

"Just follow me, Marine," said Harm as he placed her wrap over her shoulders and kissed her cheek.

####

Mac found herself being lead through parts of the White House most people don't get to see. They were being escorted to the West Wing by a uniformed Marine guard. They arrived at a set of French doors. The marine opened them, stood aside and saluted the officers as they stepped through.

"Thank you, Staff Sergeant," said Harm, returning the salute. "Shall we go for a walk, Sarah?"

"Um, Harm, this is the Rose Garden. Are we allowed to be out here?" Mac questioned.

"I called in a few favors. Trust me?" Harm grinned at her.

"With my life," she answered with a smile of her own.

Arm in arm they strolled in silence for a short while when Harm stopped and asked in Mac was warm enough.

"I'm fine, thank you for asking," she replied.

"Good let's sit down for a minute," he took her hand and lead her to a nearby bench. "Sarah, New Years is a time for new beginnings and I couldn't think of a better place to do this than were we began."

Mac's heart started pounding. She had an idea where he was going with this and she felt like she was going to burst with the anticipation. Harm lifted her right hand and kissed the claddagh ring he had given her for Christmas.

"I love you, Sarah Mackenzie. And here in this Rose Garden were you first captured my heart I want to ask you to be my wife," Harm reached in to his pocket and pulled out a blue Tiffany box and opened it to reveal a one carat round cut diamond surrounded by swirls of platinum and diamonds giving it the appearance of a rose bud in bloom.

Mac's internal clock told her it was almost midnight. She smiled and put her arms around Harm's neck.

"Give me about 10 seconds to think about it," Mac smiled softly at him and began to slowly move her head closer to his.

"10…" she counted, moving a fraction closer.

"9…" Harm's breath hitched.

"8…7…6…5," with each number she moved a little closer, her voice became softer and more seductive.

"4…3…2…" her lips were now just barely touching his as she spoke.

"1…"she whispered against his mouth.

"Happy New Year, my love," Mac sighed and she kissed him as the clock struck midnight.

Harm was so wrapped up in the kiss he almost forgot she hadn't answered his question yet. But his didn't have to wait long. Mac ended the kiss and looking deep into his eyes she whispered, "I love you, Harmon Rabb, Jr. I would love to be your wife."

Harm took her left hand, slid the ring into place and kissed her finger. Then he stood and held out his hand to pull her up from the bench and in to his arms. They kissed in the moonlight on the cool January morning as they started their new life together, in a new year, in the Rose Garden where once upon a time the Marine found her Sailor.

And they lived happily ever after…


End file.
